Mountains

I'm learning to be okay with the fact that I'm "behind," but letting it fuel me to keep going. Not being where I want to be in life or where my peers are in life was a difficult reality to accept. Luckily once I accepted it, I realized the whole time I was missing the beauty of my reality. Comparison caused me to focus on what was missing, overlooking what wasn't.

If I don't need it, am I behind for not having it? My desire to climb the financial totem pole, gain the high-rise with minimalist aesthetics, and a soft life rooted in single-use kitchen tools is not centered on necessity. And if that's the case, why am I putting this pressure on myself? It's not a need; my survival or the survival of those around me is not contingent upon the backdrop of my TikTok's.

Therefore that's not a mountain I really need to climb. Hell, why am I even looking at the mountain? If it's a struggle to just admire it's beauty, if looking is causing me such pain, then I need to look away. This is when agency comes into play. I've got to remember I have the power to do exactly that. I can avert my gaze. Putting distance between me and those mountains is a great way to shrink there size and diminish there affect.

It's hard to look away from what we're conditioned to desire but if the desire is hurting me; it's my duty to look away.